2010 is certain to be an eventful year. Let me recap on how my New Years Eve went. I came home from work and got ready for our family/friend party. Everyone started to arrive roughly around 8:30. Mostly just friends of my parents, or co-workers, and some we consider family regardless of the no-blood relation. Only one being of my age group or even near it, Troylnn. I've always considered her a cousin, even though we are not related in any way. Our families were neighbors in Magna before we moved for many years. They moved to Huntington, it's probably a good 20 minute drive from us. So they are still close by, but not as close as your next door neighbor.
Anywho, Troylynn brings her new fiance. Which is great, to see her happy and all. But it crushes me. The minute that clock hit midnight and everyone exchanged kisses, but me, it was horrible. It made my heart ache and my stomache drop. And I've never realized how much a kiss on New Years Eve could mean to someone. Especially me. Tyler was my first new years kiss. And we weren't together at the time. We got together six days later however, but the following year (last year) his family was on vacation in Arizona. So I did not get a new years kiss then either. However, it wasn't so much a huge disappointment because I was able to talk to him on the phone, and he knew how much I wanted to be with him right in that moment. This year, no phone call. No boyfriend thinking about how much he wanted to be with me right in that moment. Because right then, my missionary was asleep in bed in the Provo MTC and hour away from me. So close, but yet still out of reach.
You never really understand that saying that goes something like "you never realize how much you love something, until it's gone" or something along those lines. Yep, I'm there. I know what it means. I've felt it. I've felt it every single day for the past 30 days. And it leaves you empty inside. It really does.
No comments:
Post a Comment